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Loneliness Personified

Author: Nancy Wade

During this season of Advent, those writing these weekly devotionals have been asked to reflect on the themes of a devotional by A Sanctified Art that is being offered to the congregation.

Here is the link:

Words for the Beginning: An Advent Devotional (flippingbook.com)

The theme for this second week of the season of Advent is “We Can’t Go Alone.”

This is for all the lonely people
Thinkin’ that life has passed them by
Don’t give up until you drink from the silver cup
And ride that highway in the sky

Back in April of 2018, I attended the Conference of World Affairs held annually at the University of Colorado campus. This popular and much-anticipated week seems to attract more community members than students. The panel discussions and lectures that year were both thought-provoking and entertaining. I enjoyed walking around the campus and recognized several familiar buildings from my time as a student there in the mid-1970’s.

After I had attended several talks, I decided to stop at the Alferd Packer Grill in the University Memorial Center to grab a bite to eat before heading home. Predictably, the place was crowded with most tables full. I noticed one table where an older woman sat; she was clearly a conference attendee. “May I join you?” I asked her. “Of course,” was her reply. We talked about the discussions we had heard, the presentations we had attended. She told me her name was Polly and that she had recently moved to Boulder from Texas after retiring from her career as a newspaper sports reporter. I generally enjoy meeting new people and Polly was no exception. Our conversation flowed easily and I enjoyed listening to her talk about the differences in culture between Texas and Colorado. We realized we lived in the same neighborhood. As our lunch ended, we exchanged phone numbers.

Over the next several weeks, Polly called me frequently, asking me to join her for dinner or a concert, go for a hike, or grab a coffee. Frequently, her invitations came at the last minute when I had previous plans. Finally, in late May, we agreed to meet for lunch.

Polly arrived at the appointed time and we made polite small talk for a while. Our conversation seemed stilted, punctuated as it was with long uncomfortable pauses. It seemed to me that we did not have much in common and I was second-guessing my decision to meet with her; however, she seemed determined to form a friendship, mentioning that she loved to hike and asking if we could schedule a hike in the upcoming weeks. We had finished eating and there seemed nothing more to talk about. I told her I was anticipating a busy summer, attempting to let her down gently. Polly sighed and slowly gathered her things. She did not make eye contact.

“It was nice meeting you,” I said as she left the restaurant. There was no reply.

As I walked to my car, I glanced across the parking lot and noticed Polly slowly walking away. Her shoulders were hunched, her head lowered; her body language reflected sorrow – loneliness personified. I immediately felt regret and dismay. I silently chastised myself for being so cavalier, so seemingly dismissive of a person – a human being – who was clearly reaching out to make a friend. My lack of awareness and compassion for Polly bothers me still.

This is for all the lonely people

Thinkin’ that life has passed them by
Don’t give up until you drink from the silver cup
Never take you down or never give you up
Never know until you try

(Daniel M. Peek and Catherine L. Peek, 1974)

Loving Father, In this season of Advent, make us aware of the lonely people among us. Increase our sensitivity and help us to reach out to those for whom the holidays are a difficult time. Help us to see with new eyes, and to seek out your children who crave connection, attention, and friendship. Amen

 

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