Waking Up to God

Author: Pedro S. Silva II


Psalm 139:7-10 Where can I go from your spirit? Or where can I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there; if I make my bed in Hades, you are there. If I take the wings of the morning and settle at the farthest limits of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me fast.

Depression is real. But so is hope. This Psalm has always been a source of hope for me. When I hear it, I experience the Psalmist as a person acquainted with grief and disappointment and a cacophony of thoughts that intrude his efforts to think thoughts that are consistent with what they have experienced of God. Or maybe that’s my projection. Either way, this Psalm acknowledges that God is present in every aspect of our lives—even in our most defeated thoughts, we are not alone. Can you believe that? How amazing is this news?

In creating the sermon for February 16, The Wings of the Morning, I came across an interpretation of “If I take the wings of the morning and settle at the farthest limits of the sea” that suggested the Psalmist was saying, “Even if I am looking forward to my own death, ‘even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me fast.’” Talk about Presence! When we get this point, it is often the epitome of feeling alone. And yet, the hope of this message is that when we awaken to God’s love, even in that state, God is wholly present. 

The poem below was intended to be in the above-mentioned sermon. But the composition was blocked by my own challenges to connect due to what I described as my sense of compulsion overwhelming my sense of compassion. But once I realized that even in those moments God is wholly present, the words came to me to express what my heart knows is true. There is nowhere God is not. May this poem serve as a prayer for you as it did for me.

Waking Up to You

Waking up to You is the why of my life
You are the Dream that stops my dreaming
You tell the Story of what many fear to know
And give every Word its truest meaning

You call to me to my deepest Self
By the Name only You can give
Whispering in so loud a voice
That gives the dead the choice to Live

Many of us say we know You
But Love says that that’s not true
Whenever we say You dwell in us
But can’t see our neighbor inside of You

Or when we make the least important things
The sandy ground of our foundations
Forsaking the Rock upon which You’ve built for us
The most enduring of habitations

We’re distracted by the attraction
Of getting more by giving less
We measure others by the scale of our selfishness
Then give ourselves credit when we confess

But despite all of this You love us
And that never shall decrease
Even when we deny Your Presence
By not seeing you in our least

And that’s the refining fire
You love us everywhere we go
Even when we use Your Name to tell our lies
And act like You don’t know

You are definitely some kind of amazing
I hope my soul can reach your standard
I give up my story that keeps me up at night
To awaken to Yours that’s so much grander.

© Copyright 2020 Pedro S. Silva II

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